Tuesday, August 6, 2013

A Traditionally Modern Mom

Life is complicated, there is no way around that.  Just when you think you have things figured out, something new comes along and makes you reevaluate everything.  Like when you just get out of college and think you know what you want, only to realize that degree you just paid for doesn't seem to hold much value.  Or, when you get married and realize you want to go back to school, quit your job, and then only afterwards try to figure out how you are going to pay for everything.  Or, when you decide to have children and realize you really don't know ANYTHING!

My wonderful husband and I have been together since college.  As a naive 19 year old in love with perhaps an even more naive 20 year old we decided we needed each other and would figure out this "adult" thing together.  We started off pretty good.  No credit card debt and a solid plan (as solid as barely 20 somethings can make) for the future.  Marriage, kids, owning a home, and careers.  We thought we knew what we wanted and how we were going to get there. Fast forward 12 years and here we are.  Marriage, kids, a home, careers, and all the debt that has come with it.  Somewhere along the way I think we failed to realize how different this modern world is from the world we grew up in.  Wait?!? I have to work 40 hours AND clean AND cook AND be super mom?

This reality slapped us in the face around 5 years ago when we were blessed with our sweet little boy.  We had barely started to get things to a quasi comfort level when along came our little diva not quite 20 months later.  Life was in full gear and full of craziness!  What comes to mind is trying to nurse a baby and hold a toddler in timeout with my foot, but that's a story for another day...

Becoming a mother has been, and still is, one of the most amazing and stressful experiences of my whole life.  As all of you Moms know (I use Mom because the role definitely deserves all the rights and importance of the capital letter) nothing makes you soul search and give yourself a good, hard look more than this job.  In a world where we are bombarded through media about what a "Mom" should be it can seem like a daunting task to be the "perfect" mom.  Just look around Pinterest to see all of the things you should  be doing for and with your children.  Who can keep up?!?  Talk about major mother's guilt!  

In my mere 5 years as a mother, I have struggled to find the balance between being the traditional Mom I want to be as well as fulfilling my need to live in the world as a modern woman. (I can't possibly be the only adult in this house who knows how to use a washing machine, right?)   I am trying to find the balance between having the traditional home-cooked meal on the table for dinner every night and succeeding in my career.   I don't believe there has to be a trade off.  With a little planning it can work!  Come with me on my journey to happily living a traditionally modern life. 

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